Lonely like the Moon
by Kitsune-Veela
Summary: SLASH! DracoxRemus, SiriusxHarry later on. Two lonely souls find their way to each other but the jealousies that are contrived threaten to tear the apart. (eg: Harry wants Draco and Sirius wants Remus. O.o)
1. Protection

disclaimers: Dont own it (  
  
warnings: Slash! ^______^ RemusxDraco (rare pairing, ne?)  
  
summary: Two lonely souls find their way to each other but the jealousies that are contrived threaten to tear the apart. (eg: Harry wants Draco and Sirius wants Remus. O.o)  
  
Takes place in sixth year. I haven't read past the second book so I havent the slightest idea what happens. The time line that I"m using only goes to the time when Cedric is killed. So, I suppose this is AU. Er...Draco already has the Dark Mark *shrugs* Um...Remus is the DADA professor and is part of the Order of Phoenix. I guess you'll understand it later on. Tee hee, just read and review my story, please.  
  
LONELY LIKE THE MOON  
  
The waning crescent moon shone imperiously in the sky above, ruling the darkened heavens. Rays of the sun reached to carress the setting moon as one rose and the other dipped along the horizon. For that brief instant, the two shared an embrace before parting to their respected stations. At least....to one student it seemed as such. The hints of morning sun haloed the silvery blonde hair, the twin slate-grey orbs sparkling like the drops of dew on the grass. The sixth year folded his arms, awaiting the start of another school term. Draco Malfoy had been restless, dreams of his now deceased father and the constant summoning by Voldemort were wearing him down physcially and mentally. His emotions were past the stage of help and he would sometimes stare a little too long at the glass vial's in Snape's class; imaging what it would be like to just break one and slash his wrists.  
  
Had this been just year ago, he would have been above the thought of suicide, considering it a disgrace that only weak people used. Now....it seemed to be the only way out. Draco scratched at the Dark Mark on his wrist, thankful the sleeves of his robes covered it. Noone knew of the mark, not even Snape. Draco wasn't even sure where the Potions professor's loyalties lay now; with Voldemort or with Dumbledore. The teenager sighed, turning to go back inside for breakfast. After his father's death, people started to gaze upon him with pity, compassion, and....fear. Now that Lucius was gone, Draco was next in line to become the Dark Lord. Had this also been a year ago, he would have been exalted with fervored joy at the prospect of the power the position offered.  
  
Students hastily averted their stares from Draco has he entered the Great Hall. Hushed whispers greeted his ears and his name was said in most of them. He could feel their eyes following him. They probably hadn't figured that he would return after Lucius's demise. It wasn't as if he had a choice; Voldemort specifically gave him instructions to remain in Hogwart's to spy. He felt like one of His crony henchmen. Draco glanced in the direction of the Gryffindor table, the Dream Team glaring at him. He smiled to himself. Things wouldn't change and they were most definetely going to become worse when news of his heriancy was spread by those with Death Eater parents. He scanned the tables to spot Cho, her face full of sorrow due to her boyfriend's death by the hands of Voldemort just a few months ago.  
  
Draco finally came to the Slytherin table, cold mask in place as he settled on one side of Goyle. He picked at the food on the plate gingerly, not particularly hungry. He could sense people staring at him, not a big surprise there. No, he wouldn't let them affect him. He could deal with his problems on his own; just like he always had. Though, even if he wasn't much of a father, Lucius was there for him. As for his mother, Draco was expecting her to be admitted to St.Mungo's soon.  
  
A caw of Draco's owl came, dropping a parchment into his hands. Wary, he opened it and wasn't shocked that it came from Dumbledore. ~Draco, I would like for you to come and see me before breakfast is finished. I have some imporant manners to discuss with you. I know that, coming here wasn't easy but I am glad that you decided to return. Albus Dumbledore~ Draco snorted, incinerating the letter and rising to his feet. Without a word to his 'friends', Draco spun on his heel and marched for Dumbledore's office, head held proudly.  
  
The Headmaster was waiting with three other adults two of whom Draco knew to be dangerous. Albus peered through his glasses at the boy, bidding him to enter. Draco raised a perfecltly shaped brow. "Why are ~they~ here? Come to have me killed?" Draco's voice was strained and unemotionless as his eyes flickered over the werewolf and Animagus.  
  
"Of course not, Mr.Maloy." Albus frowned, the twinkle in his eyes dissappearing at Draco's detached mannerism. The werewolf stepped closer to Draco, amber orbs not leaving the young wizard's; as if Draco were some sort of skittish animal that one needed to use caution upon approaching. Prematurely greying hair gave the professor an air of self-respect. The other man was tall and slender, ebony strands of hair fell to his middle back, the piercing blue eyes seemed to be able to skewer one's soul-that is if one had a soul. The last was Snape and of course Draco knew he would be there. He'd probably figured out that he had the Dark Mark. Snape's onyx orbs searched Draco's face but withdrew a moment later when he realized that he was looking at a broken doll.  
  
"Why have you brought me here then? I have more important things to do then sit around here and play, 'lets guess the convict' with the likes of them," he pointedly snarled at Remus and Sirius.  
  
"I told you this wouldn't work," Sirius muttered, lapis eyes flashing with a hint of annoyance. "I dont see why your even bothering with the little brat."  
  
If that insult offended Draco, it wasn't seen upon his features. "Nor will I stand here and be ridiculed by a murderer."  
  
"You bastard! You've killed more than-" He was promptley hushed by a kick to his shin from the werewolf. Sirius scowled half-heartedly at his friend before agreeing with a nod of his head that he would remain silent until Albus spoke his piece.  
  
"I brought you here because some news that Severus has." Albus sighed, lips pursing in a grim line. "He has reason to believe that you recieved the Dark Mark before your father's death."  
  
Draco rolled his sleeve up, exposing the branded flesh. "And he was right. I'm a Death Eater now, wouldn't Father just be so proud now and Mummy, she's thrilled that her son is going to be the next Voldemort," Draco's voice had an edge of insanity to it, a shrill laugh and a haunted gleam in his eyes proclaimed all of Severus's fears. Draco was in fact broken in spirit.  
  
Remus' mouth was parted in shock. This ~boy~ was the heir for Voldemort? He was barely into the legal age and yet he beared the Dark Mark on his arm. Remus had heard stories about Draco from Harry and his friends but....this wasn't like that arrogant and prideful prat who was the bane of Harry's life. No, this was a cracked and lost teenager.  
  
Draco's laugh trickled to a few chuckles. "Do you realize that they....they cast Cruciatus on you before you are branded? Do you know how many times they can cast it in a month?" None answered but there was a glint of understanding in Severus's eyes. "Oh, I'm sure you didnt ask me to regale the torture so what is it?" he asked in that frigid voice that could have frozen the deepest pits of hell.  
  
"We think it would be wise for you to have someone looking after you at all times."  
  
Draco snorted. "I'm not some weak ass like Potter. I can take care of myself. I always have, and I always will and there's not a damn thing you can do to keep me from following in my father's footsteps. It is my destiny."  
  
Albus didn't chastise Draco for his crude language. "It doesn't have to be Draco, unless you want it. Is that what you want? To become the next Dark Lord?"  
  
Draco shrugged. "What Death Eater wouldn't want that? So, to answer your question. Yes, I want it that way."  
  
"You can't be serious," Remus stated quietly, gaining the attention of the grey eyed boy. "You'll be hunted by the Aurors. Is that what you truly want?" A flame flickered in Draco's eyes. "By the time that you ~do~ become the Dark Lord, it'll be too late."  
  
Draco sank into a chair, suddenly too weak to stand. The carefully erected barriers quaked and then cracked to dust. A few tears pricked the corners of his eyes to lazily roll down pale cheeks. "No," he choked, betraying every hidden weakness inside of himself. "I dont want it. I just want to be normal again," he murmured.  
  
Severus sat beside the trembling young man, arms curling around his shoulders. The Potions master has always seen Draco as his son and now that Lucius was gone, Severus was determined to be what Lucius never was. Sirius gazed at the scene in front of him with amusement, he'd never known Severus to have a soft side. He stifled a snicker when Remus glared reproachfully at him.  
  
"That is why we wish to help you. Professor Lupin is the Defense Against the Dark Arts' teacher and you will train under him to better protect yourself. He's also agreed to teach you afterschool for as long as you want." Draco peered up from a veil of flaxen hair to see a gentle smile highlighting Remus's face. "Severus has offered that you may live with him in the dungeon's so that you won't have to face your peers in Slytherin. There are some who are no doubt spying for Voldemort, making sure that you are doing as told." The dark haired teacher patted Draco's shoulder reassuringly. "Sirius," -After much persuasion, Albus chuckled to himself- "will be your bodyuard and will escort you should you decide to leave the Hogwart's grounds. He'll be disguised as Snuffle's to escape questions."  
  
Draco dried his tears on the hem of his robe sleeve, swallowing the lump in the back of his throat that threatened to cause more sobs. He composed himself and glanced around himself warily. "Why are you doing this for me? For all you know, I could be under Imperius and everything you've said I could take back to Voldemort. I could even turn Snape in for being a spy." Draco sighed, resigned to his fate. "But since I'm not under control......I agree to this, no matter how weak it makes me seem."  
  
"Good! The Elves will take your things to Severus's chambers. I've also arranged that you can eat whenever you feel like, you dont have to eaet with everyone else."  
  
Draco shook his head. "No, that would be too conspicious. I'm already not living with them. Their going to suspect something, no point giving them more ammunition, so to speak." Draco stood to his feet, turning to leave. "I thank you..." With that, he was gone.  
  
"It is as you feared, Severus," Albus commented to the teacher. Remus and Sirius furrowed their brows, puzzled. "Draco is indeed broken. He used to be too proud to cry and now, he just had a breakdown in front of us."  
  
"Indeed. I have a class to teach, tell the Elves to put his things in my guest bedroom.You had better do a damn good job keeping an eye on him Black," Severus sneered, leaving the office.  
  
"Greasy git," Sirius growled under his breath. Remus gave an exasperated sigh. "Sorry. What did you mean Albus?"  
  
"Did you not notice the look in Draco's eyes as if-"  
  
"He were being hunted," Remus finished. He too, was like that. That same look was in his own eyes sometimes; even recently. Loneliness was a bitter ache to feel and even worseso when you know that your alone. 


	2. Point of no return

disclaimers: I dont own it   
  
warnings: Slash=boyxboy love.  
  
  
  
~~~ Chapter 2: Point of no return  
  
Draco wondered the corridor's like a phantom and half the students gazed at him as if he were transparent and to Draco, he felt he was. Since Lucius's death, Draco was forced to keep a regal, proud, selfish air in front of his peers and fellow Death Eaters. It was a front that was slowly killing Draco's spirit to the point of no return. Draco, in his mind, wanted to be saved just like some muggle fairytale but it was absurd. Who would ~want~ to save him? A used, vile, evil Death Eater?  
  
There was worry in some of the students eyes and even in Harry's there was to a certain degree. He'd even engaged Draco into conversation during Double Potions before Harry pressed onto matters that had not yet healed- mainly concerning the rumors about the Dark Mark that the Slytherin table was circulating. Morbid curiousity had caused Harry to try and pull Draco's sleeve back to see the infamous mark but was stopped by Snape. Points were taken alongside a detention. Harry didn't ask again although Draco knew that the Boy-Who-Lived wouldn't give in so easily.  
  
Draco wasn't in the mood to attend dinner, it was self-concious terror that brought him to the library. At least there, he knew he would be alone. Draco peeped his head inside the half-slitted door, pale light streaming into the hall. He had hoped to be alone in his endeavors to raid the restricted section-the librarian was supposed to be at dinner along with the rest of the staff. He slid his wand inside his robes, not needing the Alohamora spell. Carefully, he slipped inside, peeking for the intruder.  
  
His eyes scanned the entire expanse of the room before landing on a table closest to the restricted section. The figure raised golden orbs to stare at Draco in shock. "Professor Lupin," he murmured, his feet guiding him to the table with the werewolf. He knew that Remus wasn't a threat, thanks to Severus making the Wolfsbane potion, but it was frightening that a Dark Creature that could rip someones head off without little provoking was several feet in front of him.  
  
Remus's lips curled into the kindest smile Draco had ever seen. "Hello Draco. Not hungry?" Draco shook his head. "You can join me if you like." Draco obeyed wordlessly and Remus felt he was talking to a brick wall! Remus kept his tone light and cheerful. "I wasn't hungry either though, Sirius would have my head if he knew I was here skipping out on him."  
  
"Noone would miss me so I came here," Draco explained, his voice almost inaudible. He glanced at the book in Remus's hands. "Lycanthropy? Find anything interesting?"  
  
"Unfortunately, no. I've been searching for a cure for more years than I care to remember. So far, nothing. What brings you here? I'm sure it wasn't because you came in search of me."  
  
"I need in the restricted section."  
  
"Well...I'm not supposed to but there's no harm in it." Remus went to his reading, waiting patiently for the boy to return and he did, arms laden with thick books. He raised a brow, reading a binding. "Dark Arts, A History. Not planning to kill someone, are you?"  
  
"I want to see if there's any spells on how to rid of the Dark Mark," Draco said, not knowing why he felt the need to explain himself to the professor. He scratched irritably at the faint burning sensation that alerted that Voldemort and or his minons were near but not close enough to be on high alert.  
  
Remus gave a wan smile. "It bothers you?" Draco just gave him a look that said, 'what do you think?' Remus chuckled at himself. "Quite obvious. Does....does it hurt much? Severus won't answer my questions and I am interested in knowing."  
  
"It hurts when he summons me." Draco sighed, sitting on a chair beside Remus. "I know I should hate my father for making me get this but its also my fault, you know? I could have protested and went into hiding. I thought that by getting it would make me invincible." His visage turned grim as he mocked himself with a laugh. "Couldn't be more from the truth.."  
  
The werewolf closed his own book and shifted from him to rest with his chin in his hand. He gazed intently at Draco who just so happened to glance at Remus. In one split second, two hears were beating as one and the loneliness that threatened to destroy them both had dissipated, leaving two souls on the verge of becoming one. Draco was the first to break the intense hold, cheeks flaming. Remus felt his own blazing warm at the brief eye contact. Instead of dwelling on what had just happened, Remus regan the conversation. "Um...are you alright?" Draco peered at him sharply, the reminsences of the blush giving him a more human like apperance. "You won't try anything stupid, will you?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"You wouldn't commit suicide would you?" Remus asked, soleful honey pools stared at Draco unblinking.  
  
Draco flinched under the scrutiny, unconciously clutching his tattooed wrist. "It wouldn't matter," he whispered. "Now would it?" He gathered his wits and met Remus's gaze. "One less Death Eater would make the world a safer place. Goodnight, Professor." Draco didn't bother with the gaping teacher and he hastily took his leave from the library.  
  
@-@-@-@---  
  
"I dont think you understand Albus! Draco is a very disturbed boy!" Remus shouted, unlike his normal calm and composed state. His fists came crashing onto the table in Albus's office. Sirius placed a calming hand on Remus' shoulder while Severus arched both brows in surprise at the change in personality. Albus regarded Remus with a sternness not becoming of him. "I..I'm sorry Albus. I think that Draco is contemplating suicide."  
  
"I dont think that possible Remus. Draco's stronger than you give him credit for."  
  
"But you weren't there! God, that look in his eyes I know all too well." Sirius frowned. "I'll tell you later. The point is, Draco is seriously considering it. I think we should keep a closer eye on him."  
  
"I dont think that you are right but I agree. There is no ruling out of such disasters. I'll come up with something that might help him relax. Speaking of Draco, don't you have to teach him in five minutes?" Albus reminded Remus who shot off like a bat out of hell. -I just hope your wrong Remus, for his and yours sake.-  
  
Remus skidded into the classroom to find Draco leaning against one of the walls, boredly looking at his fingers. "Draco, I apologize for being late but I had a meeting with the headmaster and I lost track of time." Draco shrugged nonchalantly. "So...where's your wand?"  
  
"I didn't bring it."  
  
Remus cocked his head to the side. "What? Why not?"  
  
"Because I dont feel like it. I'll just do extra tomorrow." Remus was at a loss. He racked his mind for something else productive they could to but there was nothing. "If you dont mind, Professor, I'd like to go to my room."  
  
"Severus has asked that he not be disturbed until 8:30. Its only fifteen minutes. Why dont we go to the kitchen? Neither of us ate."  
  
"I'd like that."  
  
The walk to the kitchens was in uncomfortable silence, at least for Remus. For some odd reason the silent boy beside him made him nervous, made him want to strike up some sort of conversation, made him want to help Draco in any possible way he could. Upon their arrival, the House Elves merely glanced at them curiously before chattering again. Dobby and Winky came up to them. "Headmaster told Dobby you might be coming. Dobby will get you some food."  
  
"Thank you," Remus responded courteously, his never failing manners in place like always. He made two chairs and a table appear and sank down on one, motioning for Draco to join him. Remus's stomach grumbled angrily. "I think I had better start to eat all of my meals and not skip. You should too."  
  
Draco rolled his eyes. "I've been lectured by Black already."  
  
"Oh really? What did he have to say?"  
  
"Everything a goody two shoe Gryffindor would say." Remus bit his tongue at the remark he was going to make. Draco turned to look at Remus, drawling in that lethargic voice that all in the Malfoy family had used. "Your not like normal Gryffindor's. Maybe because you have an air of humility. You've seen the darker side of the world and aren't swallowed by the light. I suppose Potter is that way too but since he's fucking famous it doesn't matter, now does it? He's still the Golden Boy."  
  
"Your unfair about Harry."  
  
Draco grunted. "You dont know what you talk about Lupin. If you paid attention to the other students outside of your boyfriend's godson, then you'd notice that I'm not the only one who feels this way."  
  
"Sirius is not my boyfriend."  
  
Dobby appeared, setting the food in front of them. The plates were over- flowing. Dobby winked cheerfully. "Headmaster said for you to eat all."  
  
"Damn Elves," Draco muttered, digging into his meal eagerly. After missing lunch and dinner, his body was craving nourishment. He gazed at his meal, not daring to look at Remus. The werewolf was so different from any he had ever met and he'd met alot of people. Remus was nice but not that overly sweet that made his teeth ache. He was intelligent in his own forte though he'd hear Severus bitch about how much Remus failed at Potions. Most of all, Remus understood him. He was on the same side of the track, both wandering in the darkness and had felt ridicule just like Draco himself. Remus had lived in fear for his life too. Little did Draco know that there was another thing in common betwixt them; both were lonely.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Thank you so much for reviewing! ^_____^ I've fixed the thing where now any one can review. :D 


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